he's the Salvador Dali of pubic shaving
he was sending me dirty texts but i was watchin nickeloden and couldnt get into it
im ashamed your my cousin
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
ok so hold on... from what i hear... thank you... i'm sorry... and your welcome.
your philanthropy is ruining my sex life.
Whoever said that remembering a girls name is a basic rule for getting laid has never met me.
Some girl at my gym just tried to casually drop the fact she can kegel 3 lbs...
She looks well worn, presumably from a cavalcade of penis.
I have to have sex on a bidet. I'm not sure what kind, but it's reason #4 for an Italian vacation!
I did a kegel this morning to determine if I had been penetrated during last night's blackout. Nope.
No more pre-dentist shots, I just puked on my hygienist
I was in the rappers prayer circle. Then they're blunt circle
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
You ate all the burritos in sight....I cant take you to mexican restaurants anymore
He ate me out in the warehouse on a pallet of sunlight soap. I fucking love night shift!
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