my mouth tastes like poor choices
When we were fucking i started barking and growling at her.. you shoulda seen her face
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
I'm not sure which one did it but one of them fucked the kink out of my neck
I hooked up with a 20 year old last night. I feel like a hocus pocus witch that sucked life from a child.
Apprently after I bit that bouncer, it all went down hill.
She just told me she thinks she bruised her labia in class
My boyfriend's brother just got out of jail and he is already telling us to steal cable. Dude.
I wanted lighthearted conversation about ordering bulk condoms and anal lube but he's depressed and talking about god hating him, ugh
I don't know bro. If a girl makes you cum hard enough that you pull a back muscle, she might be the perfect one to call for a massage on said muscle.
I just puke and rallied at my anniversary dinner #winning
I caught myself caressing my own hand while nurturing a glass of bourbon. I think it's time to get back out there.
I woke up naked and surrounded by M&Ms
i feel as though me waking up and asking her if i went to the hospital was a sign that i was not okay
I think I'm so comfortable in my sexual relationship because he mostly wants to see me naked with large plates of bacon tastefully placed upon my body
Randomize
