Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
Idk man, it felt like my skin was a suit and I could feel it zipping up my side and up to my mouth. And then my head felt like a ventriloquist dummy's head, with the jaw thing..it was freaky, dude
You think that's a metaphor for anything, champ?
Shut the hell up.
what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
Let's just say he looked at my vagina like it was a rubics cube.
Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
NEVER shave your cleavage hair.
Now we are really drunk and her 17 yr old cousin is shitfaced. He may or may not have proposed a toast to octopuses and double fisting. And we just drank to Mexico.
Just a heads up: The party is Fourth of July themed. Spread the word
dude its may
Work with me here, man.
Just realized my talking to the tv hockey voice is same as my sex voice. Life just got a whole lot weirder.
If it looks really sketchy and smells like burnt pizza and pot you're in the right place
After we were finished she said "That was like marriage sex". Should I take that as a compliment or insult?
I'm not pregnant. Security came before he could.
Gays age differently than straights. 29 is like 45 in gay years. Next year I'll be in adult diapers and applying for medicaid.
If you're going to do that you're going to need a pleather suit.
Sorry, was sleeping. I heard a rumor that I had a hangover, so I just went with it...
Randomize
