we did it on the carpet and she just yells out "OH. MY PSORIASIS".
He was going nice and slow, then he yelled " BOONNEESTOORRMM!!!!!". I can't walk straight.
Mom just apologized for her lack of a gag reflex not being genetic.
I came home ate all of my roomates poptarts and then vommited on her duvet cover. I don't think today is the day to suggest the whole "sex instead of rent money" idea
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
He puked in the funnel and continued to chug it. Who is this dude?
I'm doing the Macarena naked in my living room right now
I see you're taking unemployment seriously.
I woke up on the dog bed, bottle of alcohol still in hand and my thong was hanging off the family portrait.... Yikes
And if you ever tell anyone that I have emotions ill kill you
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
Any time you've had a failed relationship, I blast No Sex for Ben by The Rapture and dance around my room. I wish I was joking.
he had a Pillsbury dough boy tattoo to remind him of his drug dealing days
I don't think meeting his drug dealers counts as a relationship landmark.
Not going to lie, when I looked in the tub I expected to see what might have been remnants of a squirrel.
She's like a squirrel. She spazzes out all the time.
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