id be glad to
I feel like a need a fire hose to wash off what I did last night
I'm sorry about your car but on a brighter note I did wake up in my dorm. That's something right?
Fuck you.
Do you think it would be a good idea to mention in my admissions essay that I was the guy that streaked across the soccer field last year?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We need to put it on a rope attached to the bong, so it can't be dropped. Apparently, you need a stem safety leash.
I never should have let my cousin and his pregnant girlfriend move in with me. I'm never having sex again. They scare off men more than 'my dream wedding' pin board.
You might call them booze related cuts, I call it "partying so hard you sweat blood"
Someone had written "Boxmonsterette" on the bathroom wall and I just knew you'd been here.
I need to stop getting high and watching documentaries. Wanna go to Japan with me and protest the mass genocide of dolphins?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We were on a plane, I couldn't just grab his dick
Aint no party like a Broke College Girls Eating Stuffed Crust Pizza party
Things that happen while I poop: I start dating someone
I need to learn how to not be a fucking liability
Have you ever had a pregnancy test laugh at you?
I told him I lived in the apartment beside his brother and he said "oh, you're the girl that watches really loud porn!"
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