I just saw a commercial for "tickle me elmo hands" and I am almost 100 percent sure that at the end elmo said "yeaaaaa boooyyyyyy"
nothing can go wrong this weekend. $1500 to spend. i have options for hookups every night. my backup plans have backup plans
Ed's in which sucks about a thousand cocks... But thats 1800 less than working with Alex so it's gonna be a good day
I defriended her. I just can't support someone whose profile picture is of their water birth.
I'm seeing how long I can hold this wine in my mouth. I have so many adventures! I'm like Teddy Ruxpin!
Well at one point he got ahold of my archery gear.. And I. Shit. You. Not. Sarah took an arrow to the knee.
Can you technically cross something off your bucket list if you don't, per say, remember it....?
I was trying to remember why my knees hurt then I remembered I was twerking on the countertops.
Can we both just take a day off just to have sex? Is that acceptable as an adult?
I felt I lost my designated buddy on a field trip when you wandered off to get high with strangers.
If you're wondering about the mess, we had sex in the kitchen. There was noodles involved.
Help me help you realize you are a moron
I would wear his ballsack as a hat if he asked me to
Okay, but that still doesn't explain all the glitter in my puke.
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
Randomize
