Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
we just toasted to your mouth on alex's balls at the bar
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
I feel like I can hear facebook. What did we smoke?
I feel like I'm full of double a batteries and cocaine.
I have a weapon and I'm not blacked out. Good as gold
I hate being near you and not being able to do what I want. It's like a recovering alcoholic tending bar. I feel like Sam Malone. Except I can't bang the cute chick I work with.
I raided the fridge drunk the same time dad was eating breakfast
is it weird that our first time having sex was makeup sex?
Omg this place. I'm at a neighborhood party. My mom has kissed two other moms. Where am I
Just wiped the ashes off my forehead before he came over to have sex. Definitely going to hell.
There were containers of weed in the piñata. How much more Colorado does it get
I can't give advice right now, I have a yeast infection.
I need to stop challenging people to taking off clothes. I win too often
Dude, some chick came over here earlier and thought my lube was hand sanitizer. She poured it all over her hands.
Randomize
