question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
You proceeded to call me a hoe and then informed me that Bear Grylls is and always will be more important than I am to you.
we gave some random guy a shot for shoveling our sidewalk.
that blow job was not worth the clinginess that will follow
Wait wait wait. I remember riding in her car to the next bar. On your lap. With my head on the dashboard. That probably should have been my cut off point.
Its like every time I go out with you, it always involves Serbian chicks and taco bell and you always manage to get both all over my bed.
i probably shouldve stopped when i uncurled the curly straw in my cocktail because it was slowing me down
I mean thanks for the bj but i wanna forget everything that happened last night between 11 and 5
The words "me," "sober," and "new years eve" do not go together. Ever.
Looked like a bag of smashed assholes and smelt like a brewery - still got morning sex. Marriage rules sometimes!
I found out his moms name, maiden name, profession, and office location, his dads name and profession, his home phone, picture of their house, all of his work profiles, and the cost of their house. All I'm trying to do is find his damn twitter
Just laying in bed with my vibrator eating cold tortillas and listening to Savage Garden.
Hypothetically - think of it as Schrodinger's blow-job.
No you just wanted to pass out in your hallway because your room was too far away
Come to my place after work and we can discuss our finances over a coors delight and a fire ball shot
Randomize
