I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
I had a bacon mcgriddle for the first time today. It was like eating a baby angel.
I never Thought the day id see a chick shove a 2liter up her vag. that happened last night
I just picked up my chili cheese fries off the ground ate them, and then licked up the cheese that was still on the concrete. Thank you Jagerbombs
His balls looked like two miss shaped chicken nuggets
Dude there is a stripper at my door saying she has my birthday present. She knows my name...but it's not my birthday...
God works in mysterious ways my friend.
Well he's a 33 year old furniture salesman that picked up at 19 year old buying a bedroom set for her room. I can see how that would be awkward
Sexting Captain while emailing my eharmony match about my low key weekend is hard.
Just cried watching Wimbledon, worst comedown ever.
I'm eating a block of cheese like its a sandwich in the tsa line
Had a dream I was doing scat with Caroline. I need to lay off the cheese at night
I didn't want to shower, so I shaved my legs in the pool . That drunk .
it is time to test the effects of half a loaf of bread and overconfidence on the human body
Randomize
