who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
I am sitting on my kitchen floor drunk with a bottle of jose cuervo, tryin to make cinnamon rolls and write a paper. I love college
Just used a champagne bottle to outline a trigonometric circle for math 104.. should i give up on life now or later?
THE BIG GAY MAD HATTER IS HERE AND HE HAS DRUGS IN HIS PANTS FOR YOU. COME DOWNSTAIRS BITCHEZZZZ
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've got 2 dollars. How do I turn this into alcohol?
Well I talked to some Canadians today, and I'm keeping a vigilant watch for sharks, so I'm pretty booked up.
When you wake up, just ignore the mess in the bathroom. I'll take her home when I'm off work.
I'm going to bed early so football can come sooner
I need thought I would ever have to use the phrase "Don't fart on that Calzone".. Thanks for that
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He says it takes a lot to subdue the urge to just bury his face in my vagina. Of course, I have absolutely no problem with this.
I'm not dropping acid and watching game of thrones with you. That just sounds like a disaster waiting to happen.
Just had a flashback of scottish man yellin' at my face. What the fuck I did?
I just don't know how to say "I want to have sex you with before you graduate" in a classy way
And here I am, playing fetch with my cat at two in the morning.
Fine I’ll come with you but you better tell that guy to wear some longer shorts because the second I see a rogue nut I’m gone
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