Ummmm the art teacher neighbor asked me to pose nude for her art class for cash.
"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
i woke up to my roommate spraying cooking spray on my legs. fourth time this has happened. not cool.
Lost is over, my longest committed relationship is coming to an end.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
Maybe I'll just get really drunk on valentines day and tell him I think his penis is small
Dude he was a used car salesman for his friends' penises. I know I have something here that's right for you!
He just showed me how to break a chop stick with his ass.
Shitshow foam night was such a success
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just told the toilet I loved it. Bad sign.
I have a fever. Last thing I need to do tonight is be elbow deep in old lady pussy.
I can see your house from here
Get off of his fucking roof
If it exists, I've probably pregamed it.
You kept pointing at me and saying I'm getting chicken parmesan and no one is going to stop me
Ha! Just garden hosed my vag and thought of you.
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