Def gonna have stinky sex sometime soon. GOT TO! she has eligible friends for you, as well.
But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
i should write a book entitled 'the joys of being sexually objectified'
Mat is currently running around his basement "trying to catch oxygen in his mouth."
wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
not allowed to tweet this cos she's following me but i definitely just got head in a stairwell of the university of chicago. wanted you all to know.
you told him you liked to chip your nail polish to look like different countries. im gonna guess that no, you didn't sleep with him.
I've never watched DWTS before, but this show's got Pamela Anderson, Erin Andrews and Brooke Burke: 3 of my top 10 all time most masturbated to women.
Yeah go get her. And don't bring her clothes I want her to walk back in her Christmas stocking dress. Take pictures.
Your panties and toothbrush are in your mailbox. just not ready to be with anyone serious. take care.
My contribution to the dinner party was a bottle of vodka and a bag of uncooked potatoes. I felt like a Russian serf.
Yeah, you gave me a condom that I 100% coulda used, then an hour later you basically beat the shit out of me and physically took it from my pocket.
I thought my ass was sore from the gym then I realized it was from being spanked. Confusing time in my life.
He shattered his pelvis base jumping so his dicks out of commission for 4 months. Your up, second string.
My ex's girlfriend just invited me clubbing. Guess who won the breakup?
Randomize
