is it bad that the cashier at chick-fil-a shouted "see you tomorrow!" as i drove away?
Someone should've told Pope jumper lady and terrorist pants guy that the Worst of 2009 lists already went out....
I just found ouut you can get a DUI in a kayak. Fuck.
It was beyond pathetic. You yelled her name at every blonde chick we saw hoping it would be her. Then you puked your corn dog
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She set fire to my carpet trying to power-dry puke covered cigs with Josh's blowtorch. How she found it in the garage is beyond me but if you bring her with you again I'll shoot you myself.
Plan: drunk dancing. Reality: drunk almost getting in fights with people that could beat me into the ground.
It's like when your main girl and your side girl start having their period in the same week
You are the most depressed sports fan I know
Lube filled water balloons always make for a good time
Banana suit guy has an entourage and they're all douchebags. There is no god.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just got a 200 dollar safe, two jars, and a 500 pack of rubber bands.. This doesn't SCREAM drug dealer does it?
...you should fill the cart some more
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
He's actually really cute and seems like a good guy. And given that he likes lots of drugs, he could come in handy.
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
This is a hangover from hell. Delivered by the devil himself.
Just cuz u chase vodka with sweet tea doesn't make it sweet tea vodka
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