This dress was meant to end up on your floor
I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
sexting on a treadmill. speed 9.0 beat that slut!
I won't be sarcastic... just naked
And then I interrupted the father of the groom, to ask if she was "ballet or pole" in the middle of his story about his niece, the dancer.
You kept telling the cops that our ice luge was practice for the next winter olympics
I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
I just want to point out that nothing makes my hickie/hangover more obvious than sleeping in a scarf and sunglasses. nothing.
I remember desperately screaming that I love my life and running in zig zags all the way home
someone wrote my own number down on my hand and then call me.
When we got home I apparently addressed everyone as 'peasant' since it was my birthday, this followed by me demanding for my "peasants to wash me".
The best part of Easter was watching all his colorblind cousins try to find the eggs.
And I'm bringing my coffee cup of wine.
Bro I needs to be rescued in 30 mins...prfeebly someone died in a car accident needs to be the excuse
You just sent me an audio message of you peeing. That’s true love right there.
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