K, im just throwing this out there, i am not making out with any of his friends... Especially the cross eyed one.
how do u look a man in the eye when u own both his daughters V-Cards?
you know that saying beer then liquer makes you sicker, it should be beer then pickles makes you throw up alot, everywhere.
You stood in front of a yellow Camaro and kept yelling at it to "Transform already!!!!".. yeah, I'd say you were pretty wasted.
We had a complete conversation while I was giving him head, at one point he even stopped me and said 'I love how we're just hanging out.'
They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
your stepbrother is rimming his martinis with coke... keeps saying "thank god its tuesday". where does funemployment end and intervention begin?
I do not want to do anything. The words more tequila need to be erased from my vocabulary
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
You'd be surprised at the stuff my vagina tells my brain to say
I woke up in a sink... Not like curled up on top of it though. I was standing, bent over, face first. IN THE DAMN SINK.
Who knew wearing a toga outside would provide for and infinite amount of dick to choose fron
Always a gay best friend, never a bridesmaid
But the problem is you celebrate with your heart but I celebrate with my liver
I just realized u compared me to a coconut
Randomize
