can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
He won't talk to me. He'll only communicate using scissors
Should I feel bad that I fucked her and made her ride my little brothers razor scooter home?
We had to coat check the pizza.
Dude, you need to come clean your dates vomit off the ceiling. What in the hell were you guys doing?!
Note to self... Do not stick your head in a can of paint and try to paint the walls green with your hair
you really need to remember next time not to write your name and phone number on the paper its wrapped in.
But what if it got lost?
its illegal. you dont want people to contact you if they find it.
The police report said "I asked the suspect if he had any identification. He replied yes and gave me a Pizza Hut gift card"
He knocked me in the face with the phone during my light show. Didn't even feel it. Ecstasy is amazing
He called my boobs fluffy. Part sexy part pilsbury dough boy. Part sexy pilsbury dough boy. I'm so confused. And flattered?
Saying I've had more balls in my mouth than you is the last clear, coherent thing I remember.
Your boobs stole my birthday thunder!
I miss my teeeeeeeeth. They're in a bag in my hand.
She said she was sober from drugs for a week. All I heard was Kenny Loggins singing Danger Zone.
No actually you're a pro. You puked on the cab ride, and managed to completely contain it in your purse. the cabbie was even impressed.
Randomize
