no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
I wrote a list of all my homework due in the next few weeks. I feel I've done enough for tonight.
i took my goldfish out of his bowl last night and put him in my bed
I don't know, I don't really wanna ask the question, "Mom why am I not circumcised?"
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
he went to find a bathroom and came back 10 minutes later with a fifth of bacardi, a pack of cigarettes, and two funnel cakes. he is a man among boys.
I couldn't tell you were laughing too hard
Dude I thought I set my hair on fire. I wasn't laughing I was screaming.
Fuck that. I'm not afraid to die. I'll prove you can survive on a bagel bites and rum diet.
He would have to make magical things happen in my nether regions to actually make me vote republican.
I never thought I would be having sex behind a shower curtain that wasn't in a bathroom.
if memory serves, the guy you were hooking up with said he was a slutty skittle.
Is it okay to thank someone for the orgasms they gave you, even though they weren't with you?
My vibrator box just fell off the table and hit my cat in the head, he is a little stunned. Good thing I went medium size
I called you daddy and let you stick things in my butt, I am a damn 11.
He had a hook in his ceiling. I think I'm in love!
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