my ultimate dream in life is to have sperm so powerful that it will rival that of jim bob duggar.
my roommate and her friend got reaallllly high last night and it looks like they played scrabble. one of their words is "nippal"
Why is there a case of Coors Light with my address on it?
He shit in the bushes next to the pool at the Venetian, after throwing up in the hallway. You really can do anything in Vegas.
Having sex with her is like doing taxes, Happens once a year and I usually end up paying.
I think rescheduling my finals around when Im going to be hungover is responsible
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
Obviously a higher power wants us to be sunday drunk together
We went to the casino to try to earn enough money to go to new Orleans comfortably. I'm already drunk. This is a horribly immoral start to summer.
Have you SEEN his girlfriend?? Or talked to her? Christ almighty I'd drink every day just to die let alone black out
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
Just an FYI if we break up I'm going to sleep with your cousin or who ever my dealer is.
I'd like to believe that in some alternate universe we are living this wonderful lesbian life together..
I need an inhaler full of pot for all of this breathless rage.
Sneezing cum all over the table was not the highlight of the family reunion if that tells you anything
Randomize
