If you did the rosary as much as you masturbated, you would be the pope
I take no responsibility of who alcohol hooks up with using my body!
The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
so i woke up this morning covered in mail. none of it is mine.
We had phone sex and he came in his sink. i will never eat off one of his plates again
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
We found a swing set....it's in the front yard.
Just re-gained consciousness in the freshman girls dorm. Normally this would be awesome but I'm on the floor surrounded by chicks doing their homework. This makes me uncomfortable but I don't think they know I'm awake yet. If I b-line for the door can you come get me?
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
Then he claimed me as his prize for 3rd place in a wing eating contest. Too romantic.
I knew it was on when all she had to say about the handcuffs was 'I really hope these adjust tighter!'
We climaxed at the same time during ain't no mountain high enough. Does it get more cheesy or domestic for a non relationship?
yeah I woke up in jail with two different shoes on and neither of them were mine
Don't take advice from me. I'm simultaneously shitting and eating cheesecake.
It's becoming clear to me that I am not sugar baby material. I don't think I could handle old balls long term.
Randomize