Dude, just walked by a homeless guy pissing on the sidewalk while he was screaming at his wang. God, I love this city.
Maybe I'll tuck it in and pretend to be a woman pretending to be a man that is attracted to women that are attracted to women who look like men
Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
Watching NYC prep. Doing a shot everytime one of these d-bags flips his hair. I give it 10 minutes before alcohol poisoning set in.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't think he's ever woke up with a paraplegic stripper sitting on his face before.
you win again, gameday.
Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
Woke up with a treasure map of my room stuck with sticky tape to my ceiling. followed it and found $75 with a note saying; "eat this if we're invaded"... I'm never getting stoned again
We found your brother, passed out, floating in our pool, with a bottle, on a blow up mattress. How did he mange to walk 2 blocks and get into our backyard?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Good news: he out-ran the campus police. Bad news: they were chasing him toward the REAL police.
After he came all he could say was how great the lighting fixtures where in my apartment.
You remember the guy they called Meat in high school? Well, let's just say my vagina remembers him now.
Well she made a 15 year old cry, the grandmother did an ice luge and I woke up to the sound of sex moans
I've orgasmed so many times tonight I think I've become enlightened
I think the God that I only kind of believe in, definitely hates me.
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