I love having hate sex.
I just finished washing your number off of my chest. I'm Bryan by the way.
I knew we should have skipped class earlier, my lab partner is drunk from last night and making up his own experiments.
I was so scared, I actually heard my grandmother's voice in my head saying if I get pregnant, then my vagina will fall off. And then I'm going to die.
Blonde 1 is sitting on the floor crying and blonde 2 is asleep with her face in the toilet. This isn't what I had in mind when they asked me back
Only I could do what I did last night and feel perfectly ok working around children the next day
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
she was braiding my hair and singing forever young while she vommed everywhere at the same time. Talent.
He's passed out. He nodded his head when I asked if he's alive though...so there's that
Not my type, but the penis looks fun.
You FaceTimed your mom in the back of the limo telling her how many guys you hooked up with at the concert
How early is too early to start drinking when studying for the bar?
Riddle me this: How does one check in at the Marriott, but wake up at the W?
Girl I'm contemplating picking up some adult diapers. That's how bad this is and it's only day 2.
We went to the midnight donut shop and you hopped the counter and told everyone to "Get the Fuck out of your Bar" but to also "Make yourselves at home".
Randomize
