Bea Arthur died yesterday
You shut your stupid mouth
Betty White is next, I just know it.
Betty White will never die! She's like Dick Clark. Rue McCalahan is next.
these burps are starting to have way more vomit in them,
I wasnt that drunk. Throwing the table off the third story was totally logical.
Also, we should really buy some bandaids. Right now I'm using toilet paper and scotch tape, but I don't really think that's sanitary.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Two dudes got up on top of the pianos and danced shirtless. They didnt even get kicked out. I love vegas
I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser.
The US State Dept doesn't need to know I'm a high strung drunken whore.
MAN I GOT NO SLEEP AND HAD A BREAKFAST OF SKITTLES AND ASPIRIN. I'M LIVING THE LIFE.
My balls are resting on a block of frozen cheese in a sealed bag
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude you're fine. You're 5 minutes away from your house and you're eating fig newtons
Please don't throw the wedding bouquet at me
drinks after work?
that question mark offends me.
I am pretty great at coffee and mistakes
Yeah I'm just gonna stay here and spread my horniness to the world.
Dont you look at me in that tone of voice
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