she really just asked how mermaids reproduce.
dude totally just got the jungle juice out of my white top. i am really ready to be a trophy wife.
My brain is officially off for summer until late august. If that guy wants to fuck me, he better do it soon.
A-plus on my thesis. I deserve the blowjob to end all blowjobs. And I wanna wear a crown while you do it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's safe to say that bucket of tequila night can NEVER HAPPEN AGAIN.
Can I bring home a duck? Dead serious
He just grabbed my boob and justified it by saying "I just wanna feel your heart beat"
I don't know which is worse, the fact that he can say will you fuck me in so many languages or that I'm turned on because of that
But I mean, have you ever just LOOKED at how majestic penises are? They are like ivory columns of pure wonder!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wait also totally unrelated but can horses sit down?
I just tried to picture one and I don't think they can cause I can't envision it
People...there is no better feeling in the world than finding out via Google that your ex has a warrant out for his arrest. No better feeling.
So my mom wants to hear about my weekend. How do I make licking cupcake frosting off your face while high not sound like just that?
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
Well I typed "penicillin a" into the search engine and before I could finish "penicillin and drinking" popped up. Google knows me too well.
So I slept with some guy last night and when I woke up in the am couldnt remember his name. I text him n asked "How do you spell your name?" to try n find out and all he replied was "With an A." WTF!?
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