so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
In my 8 am class there was a pack of birth control on the board with a note saying, "Some dude somewhere is unhappy."
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
Remember in school when they told us our vag was made just the right size for our future husband? I must say I am enjoying trying to find that perfect fit.
Using your Catholic School education as an excuse for this? Why didn't I think of that?!
tell me why there is a bowl of oatmeal from starbucks in my purse
You coming home soon, man?
HENBARSCLOSE
He said he got laid, but you and i both know he was too high to leave his house.
Not sure if he was actually hot or hot in a "he brought a live chicken to the party" kinda way but I got his # regardless
On a scale of 1 to 3, with 1 being the smallest and 3 being the largest, what size nipple pasty do you think I am?
My week is over as of 8pm tonight, and I'm herpes free...Let's rage
We were suposed to have a 3some in their bathroom but it just turned into us 2 making out while he watched like a little kid on christmas morning
Your favorite boobs are sending you seasons greetings
Are you drunk texting me again or are you just being your regular stupid self?
yes
We found him. He just came running out of the closet with a bruise on his face saying he has been fighting elves in Narnia for a year.
You kept shouting about how you were the king of all bitches...and doors, for some reason.
Randomize
