Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
That's why girls suck all the time. Blah blah nag nag drama drama buy me things but I won't touch your penis
john hughes is dead. crushing any and all dreams of me ever being in an 80's john hughes film. bummer.
so just incase you wake up on the couch wondering how you got there--you came home at 7am, put ice in a cup--then you proceeded to put the cup in the microwave and melt it because you "wanted water". you then, fell down the stairs while saying "you don't know me" then crawled to the couch.
There is a half eaten corn dog and soy sauce on the counter... WTF did you eat last night??
Im so ripped right now that i just filled the almost empty bottle of choc syrup with milk and drank it straight out of the bottle. It was on pointttttt.
why didn't you say something constructive like "stop chugging that vodka"?
I just puked in my fish tank. Helloooooo summer.
no, i remember trying to staple my nipples together. I just can't figure out where the hell stapler came from.
Just spent 15 minutes trying to save the life of a fruit fly that dive-bombed my coffee. I figured it doesn't make sense to let two souls die in this place...
Heed the warning of the ghost of Oktoberfest present: German beer is soooooooo much better than our watered down children's piss. also lost all my clothes and am wearing lederhosen the rest of the trip.
well in the interest of full disclosure I have been using a used kfc spork as a buttscratcher for a month
I've entered the world of uncircumcised penises. It's disgusting.
How drunk are you?
Completed.
Beer Olympics must happen in honor of the legit Olympics.
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