naighbors jacking off again. i swear its his friday night ritual, its like he knows the night wont be ending in his favor
u sent me just one boob. one just doesnt do it for me. u dont get full on a half a rack of ribs u need a full one
Just dropped $150 at the liquor store. No power and two feet of snow has taken my alcoholism to another level.
Just getting around to doing laundry. Jesus there's a lot of blood on my birthday dress.
oh and if she happens to say anything about a cantalope and tissues... just go with it
Lost my virginity in a banana suit. Glad I waited.
I think after that blow job he got the other day he'd set himself on fire if I asked.
I think that's mostly how we became friends.
Well that, and your desire to put your penis in me.
But here's the wonderful thing about us. It's us. You could invite me over, get really wasted and end up sleeping with someone else and id be there in the morning to take you to breakfast.
We had sex twice and at Wendy's how dare you diminish that.
My vibrator box just fell off the table and hit my cat in the head, he is a little stunned. Good thing I went medium size
I fell asleep in the bathroom during my mothers dinner party with no pants on. Her friend walked In. I was told to not come back.
I get off at 11. but they've been letting me go early cuz I've been crying a lot
Roomies told me I showed up to my house alone with no pants on and burrs in my hair... I live in the middle of the city
Do you know who these girls are? They're baking a cake, making chicken enchiladas, and bringing me beer everytime I finish one.
Randomize
