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did you get engaged???
I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
I never Thought the day id see a chick shove a 2liter up her vag. that happened last night
If for any reason you were wondering if i was going to vomit at the airport today, the answer is yes.
we just got kicked out of the mexican restaurant. i have a full pitcher of margarita's hiding under my coat.
She just looked down there and said "i breed horses. this is better than anything ive ever seen."
She told me she eats fruit when she's hungover because it has more water than water.
Experimentation with dessert toppings followed by shower sex. Only logical progression bro.
You know it's been a successful day when the only reason you put on a bra was to take off your shirt
Do you think blood ever gets sick of carrying all these drugs around?
Like, there are so many different things we make it do, and it just wants to settle down and be a one-drug fluid?
Stop reading WebMD high.
I also point out to everyone that she looks like DJ's gf on Roseanne.
Colombian exchange intern from my Mom's friend's ranch loves me, and is staying the night because we got each other drunk. Successful Christmas? I think yes.
Turns out he's not a Doctor Who fan, I mumbled Alons-y as I went down on him. He asked who Alan was. No more drunk sex for me!
Sorry I crashed a riding mower into your garage door. No hard feelings??
Randomize
