and in the morning, while we were eating breakfast, she was all " i think someone sneezed into my shirt..." she'll never know.
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
the amount of blow i got, New years should last a week.
why is allison so mad at me??
me and her walked into dans and you yelled "hello my dear alli, you're looking mighty overweight today!".
crap..
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
i caught him jerking off, doing his SAT Prep. forever alone.
she's sitting alone using her breathalyzer as a kazoo. help.
Everyone is sleeping and i'm sittin here in my iron man mask, watchin chelsea lately and tryin to figure out how to smoke through it.
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
i love when the champions come out to play im bringin the shock collar this weekend
okay i am so sorry that i pulled a knife on you last night but seriously that woman knows how to throw a party.
Dude. The amount of love and appreciation from a house full of stoners when you come home at 4 am with donuts is overwhelming. The kind of love to make Jesus have to work a little harder at his unconditional love thing.
He FaceTimed me fucking his new girlfriend. He was wearing a banana costume.
I'm hungry and horny. DEADLY COMBINATION.
You told me not to tell you found out you're pregnant..
Randomize
