i just sat at a stop sign for 10 minutes waiting for it to turn green. i need to STOP SMOKING THIS SHIT.
I cant date a girl that sucks dick at sucking dick
During the middle of giving him head, he flashes his phone and says "I like to watch."
gonna sleep on the stairs... to drunk to keep going up, way to drunk to go down, gonna find a comfy spot right here... its safer that way
haha it staarrted out with just getting drunk then it turned into sports authority. So now im 4th or 5th in line and shit faced. Help me
She was sitting there stuffing her face rubbing my back with a dorito cheese filled hand while eating something else with the other hand as I was crying.
I can't wait till you move in so I can stop drinking alone.
it's a Wednesday?
:)
Excellent idea. Nothing says "congrats for resurrecting yourself, Jesus" like Greygoose at noon!
They turned motor-boating me into some kind of sick game
The blackout version of me left a ransom note to the sober self. Somebody needs to control that guy
Nah, just ran around, pinned random men to walls, bit their lips of and booked it.
Well, that was my first dog walk of shame. Nothing says "I've got my life together" like an inside out shirt and a baggie full of dog shit.
Lets just put it this way. Im meeting his nana after a mind blowing orgasm.
I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.
I don't wanna be 33 that's when Jesus died
Randomize
