he left me a note this morning. it said "thank you for letting me touch you"
no, literally. he fb chatted me and said "since you're online i figured we could bang tonight?"
She was puking in a plastic bag while cleaning where she puked on the floor. She knows how to multitask.
I cant be sure, but i think ive been drunk in this church before.
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Heard puking from next door. Looks like the third floor won't be any different than the second.
so hungover ... i gave my nephew five bucks to go blow bubbles for an hour in the kitchen.
I've been trying to brush my teeth for 20 mins now... Mother of hangovers.
he just sat there, in the doorway of my dorm room, chuggin a fifth like nobodys buisness.. don't know whether to fuck him or be afraid of his confidence
Can we put this graduation on the shelf figuratively and go drink
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He sent me a limp picture of his penis with the caption " same ol, same ol' I cant believe these are the type of guys I sleep with
You went over didnt you?
Because 9 pm Thursday you drink a loco cause you just wanna get drunk and have a good time with your friends. Then you wake up on Tuesday and you've had 17 locos and you're pregnant, lying on the side of the road, 3 states over. THAT'S why we don't have only locos parties.
I don't blame you. I made YouTube videos of me singing Rent songs then slept with a married couple. Fucking tequila.
I think that living in the "now" is the worst fucking ghandi buddha whatever advice bc that means I'm just gonna get drunk in the now.
I just told the bartender to “give me something that will murder me”
She dropped the call after she told me she doesn't want to hear about how loud he can scream.
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