You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
oh my god. i just found my camera... on top of the bush outside of my house. never let me drink everclear again
I just watched a woman break three wood planks with her boobs. I don't know how I feel about that
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
Im walking to an ob gyn practice session right now. Literally have to get face first in a middleaged vagina in 10 min.
there is nothing worst than getting kicked in the face by a stripper
HEY. That drawer full of booze in my dorm room also has aspirin and Tums in it. So don't tell me I don't care about health.
Know what was probably a bad idea? Using white wine as a mixer for vodka.
Dude, did you fall in a toilet on the way over here?
Was face down in one actually. Bars 2, Drew 0.
the cashier at the gas station pulled a twig out of my hair and told me I should probably wash it before work....it was kinda sweet.
Woke up with a lip tattoo that says "fake news" in case you're wondering about my wellbeing
No he doesn’t answer my texts except for like on New Year’s Because like I was fucked up on New Year’s and he said happy new year and I told him the same and I called him dragonslayer and you can’t really recover from that
I may forget my underwear, but you can count on me for drugs and plan b
So...#1 on my TO DO list for college is to fuck someone somewhere in the stadium during the homecoming game...you down?
Randomize
