he just put it in my mouth and said "go"
Apparently on the way out of the ER i asked the nurse to doggie-bag me some more morphine.
Its that time of week again, Bad life decision wednesday
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
Get over here. It's an emergency. Just realized I haven't hd my mouth on a penis in two weeks. Get over here.
Set off the fire alarm in our dorm at 2:30 am last night. 150 Naked people wrapped in towels shared a bag of popcorn with me as we watched the firefighters frantically search for my burnt popcorn in the building.
OMG THAT WAS YOU?!
I returned her cell phone that I found in the bathroom, I felt the stretcher and the ambulance was enough of a learning experience.
do not get into a discussion with my roommate when im sitting there naked ever again.
His flight is delayed. Mother Nature is delaying me from sex.
I'm scared to touch anything in this apartment. Even the ceiling.
I ended up sleeping on a park bench. Never using Tinder again.
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
my comprehension of H.D. Thoreau really dives after 8 beers.....
It will astound me if they ever let you graduate.
All I remember thinking is, why the fuck are there martians on the ceiling? And they were riding fruit. Like strawberries and shit.
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
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