Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
it was the least impressive dick i've ever seen... and i've changed babies' diapers.
He was crying to my sister about feeling like a bad person. Then he groped my breasts.
chipotle is closed for thanksgiving... I am officially thankful for NOTHING.
So I'm eating my sandwich... and a penny fell out of it.
We should probably just have a threeway and get everyone on the same page.
He walked in, tore open the drawer, pulled out a condom, and slammed it shut. He was that ready.
Oh my God, I want him to live with his face in my vagina forever.
She called all of my friends to find out where I was last night. 7 out of ten said their place.
I threw all my money on the ground and said it was for homeless people and fell down the stairs
I think I'm allergic to vodka. Or people getting engaged. One or the other. I want to die.
We got to his house at 7am and two random guys were on the couch shot gunning beers saying we were late for the party
I think my pickup truck has been used for the sex... This doesn't sit right with me.
the fact you finally accept your bi don't shock me but as your fuck buddy I expect you girls to go family style on me
Cats are difficult to handle. Also they are impossible to baptize.
Randomize
