Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
he has 3 profile pictures up and all of them are him riding jet skis
Miss Michigan hasn't even been Miss USA for 24hrs and already stripper pole pics are surfacing. Classy.
I just found ouut you can get a DUI in a kayak. Fuck.
throwing up in the shower isnt as glamorous as i expected
since when the fuck is that glamorous?
So i do have strep. My apologies to the british guy from this weekend. You now have one more reason to hate america
I forgot if I was chewing my gum or my tongue
I AM TEN TEQUIA SHOOTS ON AND I JUST SAW SOMEONE DO A BODY SHOT OFFF OF JESUS
THIS FEELS SO WROG AND OH SO RIGHT
well in the interest of full disclosure I have been using a used kfc spork as a buttscratcher for a month
He raised his arm and dropped it in his sleep to smack himself awake. He knows his phone has an alarm clock right?
I must be the strongest person who ever managed to get knocked down by a pug.
Also, just woke up in a Romney tank and sequin flag panties. Merica.
What happened?
New Orleans
Every time
I can appreciate that you picked up the hot drummer, but don’t have sex in front of my house lmao
The more drunk I get the more I want to steal a lamb
What would be the possible repercussions of lamb theft
Randomize
