wanna get hammered and throw tomatoes at the people standing in line for the midnight showing of harry potter and yell whichcraft is evil
I'm not sure how appropriate a drug deal is while at a wake.
Well, at least he doesn't refer to you as his associate. his mattress associate
I WALKED myself out of breath. And I'm lost I'm a Tim Hortons parking lot. That's how hungover I am.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'll just be here. Naked. Eating tots and jello like a muh fuggin G
Favor? Can you not wear as much glitter on your face this time? Walking in the house looking like a disco ball was enough embarrassment for the week 😒
I told him i turn boys gay hoping that would scare him off. Finally i found a way to take advantage of my disability.
I think as a general rule I have to have blacked out somewhere at least twice to be comfortable.
Is it possible to sluttify a hobbit costume? Cause if so, this will be my biggest accomplishment.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's in grad school at Harvard. I suppose that means my vagina is now smarter than I am.
You cried for a while then lifted lots of weights then cady's ex put glitter on your tits and then you took a nap. I got you pizza and brought you home. Nothing too exciting.
What section do you want to sit in? The screaming girls section or the "when you guys were popular I was straight and pretended not to like you guys" section?
I may or may not have spiked my gatorade to get through a game of monopoly with these children.
I was totes going to lose it to him last night, but I cried and we ate mexican food instead.
How you run into a glAss door three times in a row I do not know
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