is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
life lesson learned today: sleeping pills and laxatives don't mix.
I had a terrible day! The only thing that makes me feel better is knowing Jack Bauers day was worse.
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call.
These People Made Expensive Mistakes That They’ll Regret Forever
Dude, she introduced me to her best friend form Russia and she was a 10. Her other Russian friend was even hotter. How did communism fail?
i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....
what's with the bloody hand print on the hood of your car
I'm going to die alone in a sea of empty vodka bottles and cats.
I rarely go in there. Unless it's for mini cadbury eggs and whiskey.
Things The Opposite Sex Just Doesn’t Understand
NO. NO LET HIS PENIS TOUCH YOU.
I mean I sucked his dick at 3 AM... UNDERWATER. I think I have earned a follow back on twitter.
It's really funny to see the look on the sales lady's face when she asks why you're replacing a painting. "I knocked it off the wall during sex w/ my heels," wasn't what she expected.
My hungover walk of shame was interrupted by a stranger on a balcony throwing me a beer to shotgun... at 10 a.m....
Simple revenge plan: break into his house and steal one shoe of every pair
I know he's married but I don't know how else to show sympathy! Nudes are my only emotional currency.