i may or may not be watching the land before time
maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
I just left the house and 2 chicks are in the kitchen making breakfast. Might want to get up.
I'm up, no shirt, and staring at a breakfast casserole. Who are these girls?
I don't remember which guy I met at the bar is coming to pick me up. It will be like my birthday surprise.
25 People Confess The Most Awkward Situation They’ve Ever Been In
Homeless guy on the metro is drinking beer out of a coke bottle. Hello friend.
Did you know there's no emoticon to really tell you that I just consumed a magic brownie?
No...this little piggys going to the bar
We couldve played the bring a random boy to lunch game but i made him go home
Start warming up your vocal cords, because Fucking With The Windows Open season has arrived.
These Are 21 Of The Most Delusional People Ever
Yeah that doesn't involve enough booze, count me out
My vagina needs her own mother sometimes.
So do I get to ride the beginning of the November stache or what?
Operation terrify all men while simultaneously make them fall in love with me is going quite swimmingly so far
Your grandma changed her Netflix password :(
Who the fuck hid 3 Zimas under my pillow?! Icing doesn't count when it's 8am the next morning and everyone's left and you've passed out on your couch. Currently chugging 2 of 3...