don't go home with that guy from jersey
i know, not worth the blood test
We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
Nick had a break down & said to me "Everybody's mad at me, I'm the douchebag, Im the fucking douchebag that everyone hates, Do you wanna come home with this douchebag?!"
You're going home with him aren't you?
I'll see ya in the morning when I leave his house
i walked into the party and i guess everyone knew because they began to chant "ass to mouth"
My hand is eating my burrito and not saving any for my mouth. TRIPPPPPPPPPPPPPPINN!
I didn't realize I was holding it, until I was like, "whose baby is this?"
besides i was ending his dry spell. it's written in the bible that jesus likes that right?
While you were hooking up with her I pulled you off to make sure you knew what you were doing.
You said you were "testing the product for Chris."
I'm a bad man.
But in fairness, I would totally have a robo-penis as long as it had full sensation.
Call me and get me out of this conversation NOW. My coworker is talking to me about her birds having sex again...
man fuck you i am a delight. you're the one who fucking set his tree on fire while high
I got my gum stuck on his balls.
P.s. There are few things I love more than brand new mascara and you are one of them.
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
IT'S PERFEFT
... what?
HIS DICK. IT'S PERFECT. BYE.
Randomize
