Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
Ed hardy makes air fresheners now. Now even the air can be a douchebag.
I'm already at the bar. It's 2 PM. Help
it never fails, everytime he manages to fuck my earrings out of my ears.
so i finally decided to ask her out. she started mumbling, then she puked on me. i think i'll try again when she's sober
i'm not even sure i have knees anymore. that awesome.
Wake up. We're going shopping for booze and samurai swords.
They were so huge my eyes were just drawn to them. Boob gravity man.
I mean, how am I going to build a relationship on trust if he finds out I roofied him?
You're seeing with your vagina, not your eyes.
I've spent my afternoon dipping strawberries in DayQuil if that's any indication of where I'm at in life.
We should buy t shirt guns and blow eggs out of them at his house. Bachelorette party
after last night, ive never not wanted to live so much in my life.
Does it look too obvious if I buy wine and candles!?! In my defense there is a gigantic snow storm coming.
I am no longer and illegal Moonshiner. I just made thousands of gallons of incredibly High test alcohol with police watching and waiting for thare couple of jugs so that they can bring home and disinfect their houses with it. I'm fat with money at the moment.
Randomize
