you better believe me or I'll punch you in the face
i've never seen someone fall down the steps so gracefully... i think im in love
It's Monday. What a great day to start the weekend on the week of st. Patricks day
You ordered a "mcblizzard" and yelled @ the worker for false advertisement because she didn't flip your "mcblizzard" upsidedown. You wanted it free. I'd say mcdonalds daytime workers need to be trained in dealing with daytime drunks too. She didn't know what to do.
Holy fucking shit the worst thing for a hangover ever--A FUCKING BOLLYWOOD MOVIE BLARING IN CLASS
a pizza costume came into my possession last night. needless to say i showed up to his house wearing only the pizza, shouting "delivery" into his window.
CSI Miami is on and the guy is trying to save this woman who got shot. By stripping off his shirt & belt. THE WOMAN NEEDS YOUR PANTS OFF TOO
Give me a minute. I'm trying to buy moonshine from a railroad worker named "Cowboy."
That's what I love about being a lesbian. My roommate's boyfriend watched her finger me and then he made me pancakes in the morning. AND THEN HE LEFT.
Seriously. Are we going out tonight? If we're not, I'm going to put on sweatpants and do drugs.
for not the first time in my life, my clothes are covered in piss and i'm standing in line waiting to buy pedialyte at a convenience store
Hold on, I'm taking nudes in a blanket fort right now
Whelp, I woke up on the front lawn this morning. I have got to stop wearing these underwear. Every time I do, I end up puking in someone's greenery.
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
Getting on a bus with a beer pong table. I am proof we can make this campus fun.
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