I drank enough to make her look pretty . . It worked and i threw up while going at it
dude i woke up to her making a statue of my morning wood for her sculpture class. HOW THE FUCK do you think i feel about her?
okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
He kept spanking me and talking about biomedical science.
Aw, you fucked a pre-med? you're moving up in the world!
the coastal evacuation route ends at my vagina so you can just skip the bullshit and come over
I thought it was a myth but I have just reached the age of sitting on my balls. Not a fan.
Also.. The Hobbit does not look like a cartoon. We were just too fucking high.
Maybe if he'd step up his game and get a real job instead of donating plasma and trying to grow pot then you wouldn't feel compelled to write prisoners in Oregon.
On the upside, no one went to the hospital! Lex's friend was definitely on fire at one point last night though because he tried to juggle tiki torches. He was shirtless this morning and smelled like a BBQ.
My Captain America poster fell down. Cap is disappointed in my life decisions.
at one point while they were drilling into my jaw I just remember thinking "will I ever be able to suck dick again"
I'm just the girl with the breathalyzer keychain, and I embrace that.
Beer and Reeses. dinner of champions
I look excited, but its just a facade.
IT WAS A FUCKING ELEPHANT I SWESR!!!!!
Nathan, I haven't spoken to you in 12 years and it's 6am. Kindly fuck off.
Randomize
