He is like that thing on the menu you would eat because nothing else looks remotely edible.
tagging him in all 73 close-ups of your cleavage might have been a little obvious.
i guess it wasn't a booty call since he got home from the club at 6:00 am... he told me to consider it morning sex
I just bid on a $9000 car because I think its my ex-girlfriends. Yes I wanna hit that again.
I tell myself every day I shouldn't be friends with you
See, thats where im at with my life, welcome to the slut yaht we will be cruising comfortably all summer at an extremely drunken relaxing pace S.S. Slut Bucket
Home safe. Took me everything not to stop and pick up some random cat that looked like an ocelot tho.
Did I change midway through last night?
Seven times. The most notable outfits were UFC Fighter and Top Hat Viking
Just smoked pot with a guy who has apparently been living in the woods for over a month. He just walked out of the woods. This is not real life.
His dick is hereby named Charles Dickens. Will's is less cerebral. I'd like to call it Pinnacle like the vodka we drank when we hooked up, but I feel like that's a compliment it doesn't deserve.
So question... If I'm sexting with uncircumcised guy, do I have to add *then i gently pull your foreskin down*?
I just hope I don't wheeze during sex
I like her because we want the same things out of life AND she actually wants to have sex with me.
all im saying is 27 is too old to still be drinking 40s, you make more money than me, buy some decent shit
screw you you golddigging beer snob
The magnum condom fits. I feel like a manly version of cinderella
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