What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
So he says "lean over this" which is a chain across the doorway, held into the wall with bolts. I do. Then he puts his weight on top of me to try and get it in.
It breaks. We fall.
I now have a broken nose, a concussion, and an infected, split lip. Why do I have the worst luck in guys?
Question: If I woke up with one eyebrow mysteriously missing, do I shave the other one to match?
I look like a sausage in jean shorts, you should have woken up earlier and approved my outfit.
I was really sad when you left and cried. And i don't know what a face promise is, but apparently i made you make one.
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
Btw sorry for throwing that bag of ice at your face lastnight....
Now one day I will be able to tell my children how a drag queen in a gay bar told mommy that bin laden was dead
The bar owner gave me permission to push people into the pool. I'm never going to leave Los Angeles
as of this morning I have officially vommed on the highways of 6 different countries. It's a proud moment.
I got my eyebrow ring humped out. How is that even possible?
yeah she's crazy. she fought a possum in my alley because it was "being a cagey little cunt"
Aaaaaaaand dick pic. God bless america, and god bless tinder.
Are u alive? If u are, you deserve an award.
I don't know who's idea it was to get wine for a frat party but my poor pitiful hung over self really fucking hates them.
Randomize
