I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
Piggyback rides are my preferred mode of transportation.
I'm still reeling over the fact that you beat us all at Risk while you were flat on your ass drunk and falling asleep on South America.
And why did 3 people fail to stop me from literally getting a piggy back ride from the bar to his apartment?!
He like walks around to open car doors for me. Has already held my hair while I barf and still likes me. What. Is. Happening.
I feel the need to send all my exes pictures of penises larger than theirs. Because they all must suffer.
We have a bucket list tonight. Not done yet. Gotta climb a building
Caleb has a beard comb now. Also I have a pube comb now too. May or may not be related incidents
I mean, as I was vomiting in front of a giant crucifix I became acutely aware of my poor choices
I went to the bar without a bra on pretty sure you can go to Taco Bell drive thru with no pants
I was telling my friend about your penis and the only word I could think of was voluptuous. You have a voluptuous dick.
He offered me my choice of the Abe Lincoln or Ben Franklin dick pic.
NO FUCKING RANDOMS IN AN ALLEY
I forgot a room to the key..so whenever you wake ip and read this...I'm sleeping inthe hallway..please find me
And, by “make you dinner” I mean “have lots of sex and multiple orgasms.” So you should probably eat something and before you come over
And hydrate too
Randomize
