I'm chasing vodka with french fries.
My wife all of the sudden got markedly better at giving blow jobs. Should I be happy or concerned?
he bonged a 1/5 of jack and came back an hour later blacked out with a legitimate chicago firemans helmet
In retrospect - making it rain salt all over our kitchen was not one of my best ideas.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I need to shower. I still have paint on me from the homeless guys
i shall enjoy my approximately 2 hours of being sober today
test run with donkey pinata disastrous. broken glass and tequila EVERYWHERE
Well as our DD it was my responsibility to get us home safely. If that meant strapping you down to the backseat using all 3 seatbelts then so be it.
Romney sounds like a middle school girl and that creepy ass smile makes me want to close my blinds
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Today is National Blunt Day in the Great State of Me. Come ovah
The tit pic search didn't go as planned, some old guy sent me a pic of his balls and said stop texting his daughter. Better luck tomorrow
He is currently passed out on his toilet. Point day drinking.
I puked on her cat, I think I should at least buy her breakfast
I woke up to pee last night, got out of bed and proceeded to stand there because I had no idea where I was. Then, I heard my sexy as fuck personal trainers voice. Well-played blacked out me.
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
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