i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
he said 'i love fucking you, ashley'. it was the most romantic thing he's said during sex because he actually used my name.
Now there are nude photos of that bangin hot Russian spy chick...this is officially the best scandal ever.
he has been on a 2 week bender, has been homeless for a week and a half, and leaves for madagascar in 2 days. Do we worry or is that normal?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If you're trying to subtly tell me that I look like Connie Chung, just stop it. I already know.
OMG the post office opened my dildo! "we sincerely regret the damage to your package"
at least i was responsible enough to take off my shoe and throw up in it
Long story short, the rash from your last birthday party told me not to go to this one.
I don't care if I just threw up. You kiss me now. This is marriage.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My birthday was already very memorable but her punching me in the face put it over the top. I love being 25 and still not giving a fuck.
Penises. Everywhere.
You're. Welcome.
When you called me you were telling a hobo that you couldn't spare ten bucks bc that was your beer money. All your words were slurred.
Fuck him.
it is a dangerous dangerous place where morals and dignity go to die and all your fantasies about men become reality.
Because you failed to stop the wedding, now I have to be a homewrecker. My eternal damnation is on your head I hope you're proud.
Tell me not to drink and get on ladders. I think I need the reminder.. I'm clumsy enough sober.
Randomize