Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
Ugh now I'll have to carry around an overnight bag to all the bars I visit tonight. but hey! maybe I'll meet a dude! And need it!
My mind said no, but my drink said yes.
I just did the scooter of shame. New levels of embarrassment have now opened.
Jason Williams (yeah the ex-nets center...) drunkenly told me that, while drinking, I should take an ambien and a cialis before i go home...that will "give me a 25 minute window to have sex and then goto sleep before the bitch starts bothering me"....
He deserves to hear about your Vagina Shrooms
She called me her ex's name in a supermarket. How boring am I that she livens up shopping by thinking of another guy?
Dude it started out with let's find some food and ended up with me getting a needle in the face
Hey we need to step our game up. Dad has us beat; he stole a vending machine once.
I just want to be able to run around naked and eat grass with no judgments and have people feed me and expect me to sleep all the time.
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
Also send boobie pics with bobs burgers in background its the only way to get me off anymore
Was just trying to have a normal "I fucked you without a condom" adult conversation and she flipped
I looked like a tiger in heat. He didn't know if I wanted to fuck him or eat him.
Randomize
