Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
hot doctor. gonna get him to touch my tits. 'think i felt a lump' excuse in 3-2-1...
Lost my key. Fell asleep on the doorstep and got woken up by host grandma poking me with a broom.
Oh I forgot to tell you that while you were in the bathroom last night I made friends with a gay man named Rodger from Venezuela and he kissed me cheek and told me I "knew how to shake my thing". From now on we go to the bathroom as a team.
Then again, I'm single and napping with a stuffed yoda doll...so I'm not the world's authority on shit.
passed out in the hallway last night, now I'm sitting down in the shower, eating lukewarm canned soup out of Tupperware, listening to Carly rae jepsen.. I had a rough night.
I don't remember... but I heard a cop threatened to pepper spay my dick
I woke up today in my boxers hugging a log and realized that I think I've gotten close enough to nature. I really need to stop doing shrooms with you
Going to the bathroom drunk while wearing overalls is such a struggle
my life could not get any worse. just saw my sister in a porno
I am descending into that finals week rage fueled by ramen, mountain dew and bad sex is what's up.
i think im in europe. pls send help
How was it?
i think i smell bacon but im to sore to walk downstairs. that kinda night
I hate closet cases. I've been wooing this chick the entire quarantine. We finally meet up tonight, we're two drinks in, I've got my hand half way up her skirt and her husband calls. She promised to bring home dinner.
Randomize
