He said he only talked to me because I talk dirty in bed.
Don't fret. That vag would have consumed a lesser man.
someone owes me an orgasm
I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
I wonder who the first pervert was, and if he would be proud of me for advancing his art form by so much
I'd love to come and give you a massage, but we already duck taped my keys to the ceiling...
I did nothing besides stay sober all night, I walked home to find max naked knocking cups off the counter with his cock lol
IF HE CAN'T EVEN MAKE EYE CONTACT IN CLASS, I DOUBT THERE WILL BE OTHER FORMS OF CONTACT ON OUR FIRST NOT-A-DATE DATE
I'm really having trouble focusing on shark week with this erection
Dude it's bad when your 10 year old son makes fun of your penis size.
Obviously. I'm here to let you eat things off my boobs and help you get laid.
I will buy you batman underwear babe. I'll make sure you wear them every time we have to adult.
There is a fake eye lash glued to one of my balls.
Yes, ur purse got stole with our condo keys in it but my slut ass saved us and we had a place to stay, AND I got to choke a motherfucker while riding him. Thats taking one for the team.
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
Randomize