So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
He's like the houdini of condoms. I never even realized he put one on before we fucked. he's magical.
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
The bouncer at this strip club is my new best friend. He is also very persuasive. He got me to strip onstage for a t shirt. It's a nice shirt.
Nope. He totaled my car then moved back to Louisiana to work things out with baby mama. I sure know how to pick em
I now have a GPA requirement for guys I hookup with more than once.
We just had a 30 min argument on the actual birth date of Jesus, it ended in my brother and ain't cursing each other and an 8 yr old answering it by using Siri.
For context, I was hiding under the pong table mooing at everyone by that point.
I'll give you some choices for what to get me for Christmas. 1.You naked. 2.You naked 3.You naked.
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
Stop leaving buckets of wine at my house.
Thanks to a bad fart decision during a production meeting, I am now on my way to Target to buy new pants. How is your day?
Found out the cop gives spectacular head. Don't ask. We're going out to dinner Saturday.
Just got hit on by a 28-year old, quadraplegic, triple-cancer-survivor redneck. Now updating bucket list to meet newfound standards.
I was so drunk, he put me to bed and went down stairs to hang out with his friends. Apparently, I was curled up in the closet, spooning the dresser when he came back up.
Randomize
