my vag is so smooth its legendary
So thanks to the xanax and vodka memory erasering combo i wake up only to reopen a picture of some very familiar balls
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
we usually just have an Easter beer hunt and never end up at church anyways
finally stumbled home. 4am. made it to the bathroom and threw up. the cat came in,s aw me, looked at the vom in disgust, and then threw up too. its nice to have such sympathetic pets.
He looked me straight in the eye when he was fingering me last night...it was very serial killer.
I have an odd instinct I wont find my underwear tonight
He's like a perfect storm of amazing hair and horrible judgment.
We hooked up. It felt slightly wrong considering he is my foreign exchange student but there's a reason America imports. Foreigners got the goods.
alright. I just need to set some ground rules, no lighting me on fire, and no broken bones. fair?
I wanted to make fun of someone saying that to an untrained ear, skrillex is blah blah blah. But it was too soon after they said it. And now I can't find it. These are real problems.
Just at the gym drinking. We call it treadmillcolada
I can't even properly respond cuz I'm ballsdeep in falafel
Oh my god did you actually lose a tooth
Oh the best part of having sex with him was that he made me a smoothie after
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