i told my doctor i had 3 partners and one unprotected.. shes a cute little indian lady i couldnt break her heart
Is it gay to rub my penis between my butt cheeks and pretend that they're tits?
Wow! You need to get laid.
woke up in a garbage bag. literally. it was used as a sleeping bag.
amateur piercings on our way to the beach? check.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Our local strip club now has karaoke. Do you realize what this could mean for my sex life?
Naturally, I just peed all over the floor. Two guys in front of me looked at me, but i just shrugged. They won't remember either.
Well on the bright side, I only need a sophomore to complete the fuck-a-guy-from-every-year-challenge.
Nothing makes me happier than finding out someone else is pregnant and it's not you.
Quick question: is it impolite to pause sex to put on my knee brace?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Honestly I'm not even that excited to see my boyfriend. I'm more excited to see his penis. His penis inside of me.
Your level of morning after guilt is too much right now. Do less.
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
Bottom line; if I'm coming out of my bat cave to do the dishes and get a chicken wing and I have no pants or makeup on and my messy bun looks more like Santa got leprosy and crashed his sled into the back of my head then let me be. That's all I'm saying.
i need to get drunk because i'm an angry sober
you bounced a quarter off my butt and it came back hitting you in the eye. karma, bitch.
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